HOLDING GRUDGES

.By Vernalee

It's been said,"Holding grudges can be just as damaging to the grudge-holder as the person who the grudge is being held against. Holding a grudge means that you are living with a feeling of anger almost constantly, even if it's below the surface"

What does this mean? I’m glad that you asked!

Holding a grudge is defined as " hanging on to intense anger or dislike for someone based upon a real or perceived wrongdoing."

Alright, don't act innocent as if you don't know what I am talking about. Most of us have held grudges before. Let’s be truthful. Admission is the first step. Right?

And ... If you have ever held a grudge, you can probably attest to the resulting harm that it causes. Like a plant, grudges take roots and grow like running vines attaching themselves to surfaces like an adhesive. This is why they are hard to shake and detach. Unquestionably, the process can produce physical and psychological damage. The repercussions can be great. Stress is bound to occur. Think about it. Keeping another person's acts of wrongdoing in your mind is totally unhealthy.

Letting go of the associated anger and dislike is the antidote; the needed cure. And when you do, it places you on the road to recovery as does forgiveness. Besides why waste your valuable time and personal space possessed with negative thoughts of others when undoubtedly they may not be thinking of you; not even remotely! You’re holding the grudge. You’re suffering. Not them!

Though difficult it may be, the release valve must be turned on!

As for grudges .... let them go! Sure it’s difficult to do; it’s work - but it’s well worth the tasks. We deserve the freedom that it will yield. Our mind, body, and soul will most definitely thank us!

Photo credit: www.Debate.org

ARE YOU AND YOUR COMPUTER BEST FRIENDS?

By Vernalee

Who is your best friend?

Brace yourself. Your answer will probably not be as long as the far stretching Mississippi River. Alright, I will admit and have been told that sometimes, I can be somewhat dramatic and theatrical. I try to keep my feet on solid ground, but occasionally I’m put to the test .. like when I recently read an anonymously posted comment that brought me down to earth. It went like this: “Basically my computer is always there for me and so is the internet. They are without a doubt my two best friends. I mean I have human friends…but I don’t hang out with them as much as I do with my computer and they can’t be with me when I travel. I’m also pretty sure I have a computer addiction.” Like a fishing rod, I was reeled back to reality. Just when you think that you have heard it all, someone comes up with a comment that makes your over the edge tendencies appear minuscule. At first glance, this posted comment seemed strange. So much for normalcy; it can become a castaway quickly. I reflected for a moment. Do know this! I am as gregarious as they come. I love the human touch and interacting with people of all races, creeds, and colors. I love my friends and we stick by each other through “thick and thin.” I wouldn’t trade my few treasured friends for anything. Truly I wouldn’t! Things can change so spontaneously sometimes. It did with me. Allow me to elaborate. Last week, I misplaced my phone for a few minutes. I became an instant dummy because I couldn’t remember any telephone numbers. They were conveniently stored in my cell phone. I couldn’t communicate with the world. I was temporarily stalemated. It was at this point that I realized how chummy we (my computer, cell phone, and I) had become. I click those keys continuously. I have become a reliant dependent – technologically. Here’s another confession unknown but to a selected few. My iPad sleeps in bed next to me; an inert paramour of sorts. As it lays on my fluffy pillow, it helps me stay current on world affairs and rapidly respond to my emails/text messages – in real time. I love my technological pals. I feel lost without them by my side; lonely to be exact! I even feel naked … no exaggeration; well maybe a little! For the record, and as an aside, I love my precious human friends; they love me. No doubt about it! We share and have shared so many emotions, feelings, and have experienced wonderful cherished moments together. We regularly converse (often times via texts/emails), take trips together, and tell jokes that aren’t funny and stories that are much too long. We have secrets that can never be told. Hmm… Oh my … The same is true for my computer! I just realized that revealing coincidence. My friends and my computer – the nexus is too uncanny! Don’t laugh. It’s probably true for you too!

RELATIONSHIPS LEAVE STUFF BEHIND

By Vernalee

When we are involved in relationships

(personal and professional) , it is serious business! Attachments are formed. Familiarity becomes a standard. When our relationships work, it is a great thing! When they don’t, discontentment is our by-product. Getting rid of the bad apples and walking away are not always easy tasks. Challenging, isn’t it? Therefore, it is imperative that we are careful and selective about who we let into our lives and into our precious space. Whether it is in a good or bad way, people “rub off!” Sweet is better than bitter; good is better than bad. You choose. Choose wisely. One thing is for sure. We live with our choices – good or bad. Photo credit: www.pininterest.com