HAVE YOU EVER BEEN THROWN UNDER THE BUS?

By Vernalee

According to the definition, to throw (someone) under the bus means to sacrifice another person (often a friend or ally), who is usually not deserving of such treatment, out of malice or for personal gain. I hear this colloquial expression all too often. Though it is an idiom, its meaning is bigger than life. I am sure that it (being thrown under the bus) has happen to you at some point in your life; as it has to me – quite a few times. In fact, more than I care to remember.

The act is unquestionably more serious than someone spitefully snitching or being a traitorous “Benedict Arnold,” although those actions are indeed hurtful as well. To be thrown under the bus is a terrible deed, but to be kicked into the streets beforehand is bona fide cruelty.

Don’t you agree?

How can it be argued that the kick was not intentional? How can the person say that they didn't mean to do it?

Unquestionably, with the – egregious kick and throw routine – a person becomes mincemeat by someone purportedly that he/she trusted.

Because of the closeness of your relationship, you didn't see it coming.

Pow!

Sure this can occur in the physical sense, but let‘s discuss those figurative and emotional kicks.

Characteristically, without question, emotional bruises are the toughest to diagnose and treat.

Our feelings are so hurt, because we did not expect to be pushed nonetheless ran over with unkindness. It was done in such a fashion that it was no time for avoidance; no time to get out of the way! It was harrowing and terrifying!

Can I get a witness?

Constituting more than just target practice, a little kick hurts your feelings and can tear you down emotionally. It has a taunting sting.

Ouch!

Your emotions are so damaged because other people witnessed the kick. You can‘t lie or hide what happened.

What should you do?

I’m glad you asked!

You have to pick yourself up.

You have to go on.

Whether the person that kicked you receive a slap later on their derriere doesn't matter. Trust me - They'll get what's coming to them.

What matters is your ability to pick yourself up and bounce back after the fall. Photo reprint: www.corporateroadkill.com

CRABS IN A BARREL: IF I CAN'T, YOU CAN'T

By Vernalee

There is a phrase commonly referred to as “Crabs in a Barrel.” Essentially, it means that if I can’t have something, neither can you. This phrase takes its metaphor meaning from the crabs. Through their very nature, crabs have the tendency to pull at the other. As soon as one ascends a few inches, the other pulls it down. Subsequently, none or few of the crabs can escape or get out because of this pulley effect.

Human nature can be no different. Some folks pull down the other because of jealousies, spite, egos, and envies; some for no specified reason. Rather than see someone achieve success, they will contribute to their demise. They harbor resentment to the other’s success, particularly if it is greater than theirs! It is a short sighted way of thinking, but a reality that unfortunately exist for too many folks! They regard their actions as a contest. Duh! No one should take pride in holding someone down.

Their animal like portrayals to the crabs’ shells, claws, and tails keep getting in the way of their thinking, activity, and progress. How unfortunate! They intentionally get in the way of others and periodically get in the way of themselves. People just like crabs fail to realize one thing. If everyone is pulled down, no one moves; no one reaches the top. All movement is stymied. It’s a “funny” thing – Holding others down can hold you back! Photo credit: www.crabs2.com

WATCH THOSE ORANGE BARRELS

By Vernalee

We see orange barrels everyday on the roads and highways. They provide navigation signals, alerts, and directions. They may also signify a host of traffic related nuances. For sure, we steer around them. Mostly, we slow down. Maybe, it’s danger ahead - construction work, pavement disasters, or something concerning. The orange barrels warn us beforehand. Their bright orange and white colors are visibly noticeable. We cannot miss them!

Changing the course, what about the “orange barrels” that we see in our relationships? Many times, they too are visible, very noticeable, and usually represent repetitive behaviors that flash warning signals. Unlike the highway orange barrels, we tend to ignore them. We navigate right around them. Sometimes, we think we can change the negative behaviors that those relationship orange barrels represent!

Stop! Realize this! You are not Harry Houdini! You cannot remove the barrels; they belong to the other person – not you! Duh! If you keep cruising along, ignoring and excusing the actions of people and the signs that their bright orange and white barrels signify, you are doomed to crash! It is no secret that their actions have caused you excruciating pain and hurt you deeply.

Heed the warnings; steer around the danger zones; deal with folks as you navigate carefully. Because of their obtrusive negativity, they may have to be physically and emotionally removed so that your immediate and final destination can be reached pain free.

Don’t ignore what you see in your path! They may not change their course, but you can change your direction.

We are all on a journey of some type. We wouldn’t ignore the orange barrels on the highway; therefore we shouldn’t ignore them….. in our lives!

Photo credit: www.wnem.com